For some reason, I'm tired. I thought I'd be excited to be home, but I think I'm grieving the loss of leaving. I'm going to continue outpatient treatment, going up once a week for a group, and to meet with my therapist. I'm in a good, solid, place emotionally, spiritually and physically, but I guess there is a LOT of fear about being back in the "real world" and having to move forward, meeting my fears and walking through them with the support of others in the program, and turning them over to my Higher Power.
I've just completed my fifth step with my sponsor in Palm Beach Gardens, but my therapist wants me to do it with her as well. My sponsor and I also did Steps 6 and 7, and the beginning of 8. I realize, though, that I need to add to my fourth step inventory some things I didn't think about, so I'll do that before doing the fifth step with my therapist.
I am so grateful!
- Grateful for this gift of time to work on myself and focus on issues that have contributed to my drinking and my inability to stay sober.
- Grateful to have God in my life again, and to be able to turn things over to Him.
- Grateful to be able to accept and offer forgiveness.
- Grateful there is a solution, and that I can live in it and have a life that is full, joyful, and meaningful.
- Grateful that I have many years of recovery ahead of me to grow, and to work with others and give back to this program.
- And last, but not least . . . grateful that I can delete comments forever!
10 comments:
I am so glad to see your post. You sound absolutely great! I have thought of you often, very happy to see you are sober!
welcome back! and nice to hear from you again.
i wish you lots of strength and luck back in the 'real world'. you are sounding well!
Designer Girl said...
What you are preaching is the anitithesis of what Jesus taught, and it's difficult for me to imagine that you are truly filled with the Holy Spirit if such negativity is the only "fruit" that is apparent.
Greetings Designer Girl
I felt some pain when I read your comments. I imagine you were projecting your TERROR onto me. Your process is not about me, but unprocessed STUFF from your childhood. You are a CLASSIC RAGEAHOLIC - you have a conscious fear of intimacy and an unconscious fear of abandonment. Your brain has slowly been altered with Wilson's anti - Christ propaganda. You never mentioned how you felt? Were you FROTHING at the mouth when you posted your comments? Were you abused as a child? I suggest you get down on your knees and ask Jesus Christ to forgive you for the above DIATRIBE (sins). I love you, Designer Girl! Do you love me? How do you feel?
PEACE BE WITH YOU
MICKY
It's GREAT to see you back. I am so glad that you have received another chance. Many don't.
I'll look forward to reading your gratitude lists - once again.
Thank you.
MICKY, if you're going to quote me, please do so in entirety:
You present yourself as a Christian, yet you spew hatred and venom by leaving comments on other people's blogs with whom you have no connection except your prior involvement in AA.
Please keep your comments to yourself. They will help no one see the blessing that can be found in a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, because, unlike Him, you preach from a self-righteous desire to retaliate rather than to help others find their way to salvation.
For your own sake, I hope you will find a new therapist, because the one you have is poisoning your mind. What you are preaching is the anitithesis of what Jesus taught, and it's difficult for me to imagine that you are truly filled with the Holy Spirit if such negativity is the only "fruit" that is apparent.
- Designer Girl
Some, indeed, are sicker than others. I'll pray for you.
Oh how wonderful to see you back darlin'. I'm so glad you posted and that you have found some peace.
Welcome back! We can't do this alone, but with everyone's help - we can stay sober :)
Welcome back! Those days are looking good on you!
Welcome home Baby! How great to have you back. The blog looks great. As usual~
xoxoxox,
Gwen
Fricken AWESOME!!!!! You are an inpsiration.
I just made the decision to go back into rehab. I am so scared, I posted something on my blog. I cannot endure this relapse anymore.
Anyhow I hope that I can get the serenity that you have. I have been trying on my own but have failed over and over again.
Keep doing what you are doing, DO NOT loose your sobriety. I promise it is a worse Hell than the one before.
Post a Comment