Not So Random

I've been meaning to post for days now. I keep having those little "aha moments" and think at the time "I have to journal this so I don't forget," but then I get busy or get distracted by something else, and I never get around to it.

I'm not recalling any specific moments right now, but just want to get this down on paper, or at least in a format that I can look back upon and remind myself, that the promises do begin to come true before we are halfway through the steps and that the gifts of the program and of my Higher Power whom I call God, are truly infinite.

I've been so scattered lately (the past few days) and I'm not sure why. I have a lot of energy, but it seems to be frenetic and I can't keep myself focused upon a given task without really consciously striving to do so. Yesterday, I found making myself a "to do" list and checking off each task as I accomplished it really helped me, not only to stay focused upon what I was doing, but in having a sense of purposeful consciousness.

At the end of the day, I hadn't completed everything, and in the past, I would have told myself how I sucked for not being perfect and getting everything done I'd intended. Instead, I was able to look at what I HAD completed, and the fact that the items ticked off far exceeded the items still to be done, and I felt really good about it, and about myself.

I have to remind myself again and again that I am not defined by what I do, that I am enough, just as I am, and I deserve to be and AM accepted and loved by God, just as I am today.