I don't know why this move is so much harder than previous ones have been, but the reality is that it is, and I have to recognize that, and be a little easier on myself.
So, yesterday afternoon, I stopped unpacking for awhile and watched Enchanted April, which always lifts me out of a blue funk, and more importantly, shifts my awareness to outside of myself, and reminds me that if we give love only as we receive it, we will indeed find ourselves miserable. It's only when we decide to love generously, and not in proportion to what we receive, that we can truly be happy. Or something like that.
Breakfast at Tiffany's and Sense and Sensibility also have mood-lifting, focus-shifting impact. Therapy by cinema.
"This place makes me feel flooded with love. The important thing is to have lots of love about. I was very stingy with it back home. I used to measure and count it out. I had this obsession with justice, you see. I wouldn't love Mellersh unless he loved me back exactly as much. But, he didn't and neither did I. The emptiness of it all." (Lotty Wilkins in Enchanted April)
4 comments:
No need for sorries, you are human and dealing with a beast that is ciunning, baffling and powerful. You are not alone even when you feel alone. I am glad to hear some sunshine in your post.
I am glad that you are feeling better.
GOOD FOR YOU for doing something positive that makes you feel good! I'm a huge fan of Cinema Therapy too and have a stash of movies that soothe, entertain and/or just make me feel better. Another thing I do when I'm in a terrible funk is hit a day spa or get my hair cut. Getting someone's hands on me (non-sexually) really, really helps dissipate black clouds of doom.
Glad you are feeling better. Moving is a bitch when it comes to reconnecting with AA. It is like being a newcomer all over again. And if you have moved several times (like me) its being new again and again and again. I never really had deep roots I moved so much. I have finally been in Central Jersey for 7 yrs. That is the longest I have lived anyplace since I was 14. It was the hardest move on me.
((HUGS))
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