I've spoken up in several group meetings and identified myself as a newcomer both to the program (okay, relatively new) and to Dania Beach, and people have given me phone numbers afterward.
At the women's meeting last Monday night, I went up to the facilitator afterwards and said "I need to get a sponsor."
What I meant was "I would really like YOU to be my sponsor. Or someone you suggest."
She introduced me to several women and had them give me their phone numbers.
So I'm a little frustrated.
Obviously, the onus is upon me to call me them, and I don't want to because:
- I'm nervous calling people I don't know.
- I'm really apprehensive about asking a favor from someone I don't know.
- I fear rejection.
- What if I ask the wrong person, and then I'm stuck with her?
Please kick my butt and make me call someone.
Short Gratitude List:
- 14 days of sobriety.
- Another beautiful hangover-free morning.
- You awesome blogging fellows and fellowettes (LOVE Carly's word!!).
- Waffles on Saturday morning. With real butter and real maple syrup.
- That since I cut out the alcohol, I can get away with waffles once a week without packing on the pounds (so far, anyway!).
P.S. Hey, please take a moment to stop by In My Alcoholic Mind and let her know we hear her and care. Thanks.
21 comments:
Just start callin people girl. One of my big mistakes was to ask people without having talk to them enough first. You can ask someone to be a temporary sponsor while you are getting to know some of the women around you. It is awkward but take that leap of faith and God will put the teacher in front of you.
G~
Hey - you're talking my language. I need to find a [new] sponsor as well.
What's the worst your 'target' (lol) can say? "No!", I guess.
Good luck!
:-)
Hey Girl! I'm so happy when you post. :)
Yes, it's nerve-wracking, sort of like being in kindergarten and asking a sophomore to dance. :) LOL! Just go for it. You can always change sponsors. I was told all sponsors are temporary, whether you work together 2 weeks or 20 years.
A "no" isn't a rejection, it just means your HP has a better one waiting for you to ask her!
JUST DO IT!!!
Start calling. Pick the wrong one - say one that just doesn't get you or understand you the way you think they should - call another. I'm on my second sponsor and I believe I have found the right one.......I know I've found the right one because we are now friends. I know it's not easy.
I see you,
JJ
I would go to a big women's meeting, listen to people speak, and go up to the one woman who said the thing the moved you most and ask her.
I found an awesome sponsor that way, and I only listened to her for a couple minutes. Keep the numbers and use them if you have to, but I think you should have a brief gut feeling about who is right for you.
And if someone turns you down, don't take it personally...they just have too much on their plate and you wouldn't want your sponsor to be too busy, anyway. It's God's way of saying you need to find someone else...
Hey, everyone! I think I may have a sponsor! I went up to someone yesterday and asked her if she'd consider sponsoring me. She has just had her 1 year anniversary, though, and is still working the steps (she's on step 10), so she said she would need to check with her sponsor and see what she advised. I thought her answer was SO mature and humble, so that made me feel like I made a good choice in asking her. Also, if it doesn't work for her to do it, I've crossed that fear threshold now, and won't be as timid about asking someone else. I'll update you when I get an answer one way or the other from her.
Oh, that's good news!
I need a sponsor too. I might even need a team of sponsors at this point, lol.
But thanks for sharing your experience. I have some numbers I need to call, but I've been dreading it ...
Yes, I fear rejection too. One way to get around that was to ask someone to be my temporary sponsor. If it works out great if not....
Oh, by the way, pray first
Oh good for you! I hope you find a sponsor!
I have been thinking about asking someone else to be my sponsor... but now, after seeing what people have been sharing, I just need to get off my butt and call my current sponsor first and work those steps!
Congrats on your two weeks... now two and a half probably!
Peace..
Good for YOU! Keep us posted!
Yes to what Gwen said. As well as everone else. I think getting a sponsor is another in a series of acts to get your ego in check. It was crushing for me to ask someone to be my sponsor, After you get one you'll soon see the folly of such resistance. It *is* the the most important thing you can do in recovery. You;ll learn equally from sponsors you don't like as you will from Yoda type sponsors.
You can change at any time you wish.
Just find someone who has the sobriety you want.....
Asking for a temp sponsor is a good idea. I fear rejection too, but I found one. You will too. I'm happy you are here!!
Just ask. I understand the fear in this, I have been there. Don't think too much about what the future of being sponsored holds for you. Thinking too much into it can lead you off the right path.
There has been a few times I thought my sponsor was not the right sponsor for me. Um, like what the hell do I know. I think I know how to be sponsored the right way. In the end God showed me that the relationship is meant to be. I am so thankful I did not interupt my HPs plan.
Sometimes I do get the roles mixed up.
Don't think, just do the action and ask. You will discover amazing events!
I just saw your kind words to me...Thank you.
Just tell her that you want her to be your sponsor.
I've got a sponsor!!! And, she's already got doing step work!
Woo-hoo!! :D
WOO HOO! Congrats on your new sponsor! Are you going to write a new post soon, or do we get to boost this one's Comments count up to 100? :)
I'm proud of you. Hugs, darlin'!
Yay!!!! Three cheers for a sponsor!
Hip hip hooray!
Hip hip hooray!
Hip hip hooray!
ROFL! I'll do a new post tonight or first thing tomorrow morning. I've been so busy the last couple of days, that I just haven't had time!
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