While I was in rehab, I picked up smoking. After 25 years. I started out at about 6 cigarettes a day, then quickly (within 3 days) was back up to my old habit of a pack or more a day.
After about 6 weeks, the nurse practitioner put me on Chantix (at my request), but it made me so nauseated that I quit taking it the day I went up to a full milligram in the morning (after vomiting twice).
So here I am, sober, but smoking. My husband is none too happy. I don't like the fact that I spent $70,000.00 on treatment for one addiction just to pick up another one that is also terrible for me. I hate the way my hair, clothes, breath and car smell.
Against the advice of my therapist who thinks I shouldn't try to stop smoking so early in my sobriety, I'm giving the Chantix another try. I'm making sure to take it with food, and to drink plenty of water. I'm still just on the .5 milligram once a day dose, but so far, so good. I'm still smoking, but yesterday I lit up a Camel Frost and had to put it out after a few drags (my Djarum Bali Hais are still tasting pretty good, though).
I've started another blog, Breathe Again, to help me along THIS particular journey, so I'd appreciate any support and advice any of you former smokers or want-to-be-former-smokers can give me.
Sobriety-wise, I'm doing okay. Not dealing with any major cravings, although I did have some this past weekend, but it was the stress of moving back home and leaving my life in treatment behind, and I handled it by going to meetings, talking about it to my sponsor, therapist and alcoholic friends, and processing it to get to the bottom of what was going on.
I've only been to one good meeting since I've been here. I went to my home group yesterday afternoon, and it's totally changed. People were talking all through the meeting, there wasn't an atmosphere of mutual respect and consideration, and it was just not what I needed.
That's okay. Meetings change, and there are plenty in this area. I just need to visit some new ones and find the ones that are right for me. I'm grateful that I live in an area where there are a number of meetings to choose from, and I'm grateful that I can walk into any one of them and know I'll be among friends.
9 comments:
It's lovely to see you're back and in good form. Well done you.
You're right - all meetings change and ebb and low. Same over here.
Take it easy.
Proud of you for sticking out rehab. Not everyone does...
{{{SHE'S BACK!}}}
I know this advice is no longer popular - but, I say just worry about not drinking for today. You can quit smoking later. It took me 7 years to quit and I didn't do it a moment too late. I am grateful I had those cigarettes in the early days to help me though.
love the new look blog, it's real eyecatching!!!
good luck with the smoking (or non-smoking rather). but don't push yourself too hard now. find your balance back at home first.
good luck!
As MC said, you'll stop smoking when you're ready.
I was a 3-pack/day smoker for 36 years. I stopped last year, cold turkey, with the help of a book and a whole lot of willingness. I have not regretted one moment nor have I wanted a cigarette since.
"The Easy Way To Stop Smoking"
by Alan Carr
Welcome back! I did the same thing, I picked up smoking in rehab. I quit a year or so later but, I seemed to need it then.
First Things First girlfriend! Keep going to meetings and working those steps. It will all work out.
It was suggested to me that I not try to quit smoking during my first year of sobriety. I wanted sobriety so badly that I followed every suggestion I could. There is a reason your therapist suggested you not quit just yet. This is not about what you want to do, it's about getting and staying sober with the minimum of distraction. People have gotten sober and quit smoking at the same time, but really, why risk it?
glad you've rehabbed, bummer on the picking up smoking but ya know, you have plenty of time to quit that. I wouldnt risk my sobriety just now if I were you.... find some meetings ya like, attend them like crazy, get you're sobriety happening big time, and maybe think about quitting smoking later.
It took me until I was a little over 5 yrs sober before I was able to quit smoking. Know how I did it? I was ready, and I used the 12 steps and my HP. It sucked, it was a bitch but I am smoke free coming up on 7 yrs.
Oh ya I totally know about cross addiction. I think I have a degree in it (from experience you know).
Baby steps, one addiction at a time. I have seen many recovery from the drink first, allowing a solid foundation and then they get to depart from the others. Good Luck!
Where's Designer Girl?
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