Still wide awake and so sad.
It's 12:52 AM and I have to get up at 5:30AM.
To get ready to go to a job that I'm beginning to hate.
A job that saps my self-esteem and confidence.
A job that makes me doubt myself, and makes me feel that I am worthless.
I'm seriously thinking of calling in sick.
After all, I'm sick at heart, sick in the bottom of my soul.
So, it wouldn't really be a lie.
But, that would just exacerbate my boss's frustrations and doubts with me.
But, how can I go in, knowing that he thinks I'm an incompetent idiot who will never learn anything, or change what I'm doing wrong?
Worse still, the one person I thought was my friend has gone behind my back and given him a list of complaints about me and my "performance."
Like she's perfect.
Like she doesn't make the exact same mistakes.
My eyes won't stop tearing, and I can't see to write more.
I hope things look better in the morning.